Friday, August 14, 2009


Who hasn't received pictures in their email of some fantastic event or incredible circumstance? I must be a magnet for these things because I get them all the time. A few times I've even forwarded them to friends, thinking they were real, only to find out later that they were digitally faked somehow. "I was done being duped," I said to myself.

About a week ago, I got some pictures sent to me titled "Do you know what a 320 pound woman looks like?" The obvious joke is that you're supposed to expect to see some Goodyear Blimp of a person, but in this case, that's where the "amazing" part of the picture came in. The following pictures were purported to be of the "World's Tallest Woman". While she was not identified by name, she was said to be 7'4" and weighs 320 pounds.

"Wow, this is amazing," I thought. But then that internet alarm bell started going off and I then decided that if I'm going to publish these pictures that I should "check it out first". To no surprise, this same description has been floating around for several years without a name to attach to the photos. But this is just part one of the story...a story that has international implications.

ABOVE: While we don't know who this "Mystery Amazon" is, she is supposed to be from Holland.

ABOVE AND BELOW: Our mystery woman has legs that never seem to end. Do her shoes below indicate a possible basketball career?

ABOVE: If these pictures aren't real, the photographer went to a lot of trouble to make sure they looked that way. Notice the shadows on the ground.

Heather Greene of Las Vegas is a real person, although she likes to enhance her stature a bit. She can normally be seen wearing high-heeled shoes (why?) while posing with people who are below average in size. For example, the man in the picture is 5'7 (my size coincidentally although I never considered myself below-average) and the woman is 5'1". Heather Greene stands 6'5" tall in her bare feet. Tall? Yes. Attractive? Yes. Tallest? No.

ABOVE: She might be smiling now, but could you imagine her throwing this guy around the house if she had a bad case of PMS? BELOW: " Aychee mama". 'Nuff said.

Sandy Allen of Shelbyville, Indiana was a person to have been recognized by the "Guinness Book of Records" as the World's Tallest Woman. At 7'8 1/2" she would have qualified today, but alas, Sandy passed away in August of 2008.

ABOVE: Sandy Allen was very "Alice-the-Goonlike" before her untimely death in 2008. I'm not 100% sure, but I may have dated her in high school.

So then who is the World's Tallest Woman?

Unofficially, that would be Yao Defens of China who reportedly stands at 7'7" and weighs in at 396. While researching her story, I learned that she is employed as a circus act by a ruthless boss named "Mr. Qui".

Every time Yao asks to go to a doctor (she suffers from severe back pain) her boss takes her up onto a mountain and locks her up until she agrees to perform again. Her boss even tricked her into signing a new contract after her old one expired!

So in this land of umpteen billion people where human rights have little meaning, the real "World's Tallest Woman" is being some kind of human "King Kong". In fact, this story was so compelling, that the editors here decided to reproduce the original article below, so that you could get the full impact of the atrocities being committed by the evil boss "Mr. Qui" and his traveling circus. Take the time and read this story immediately following the picture of Yao Defens below.

ABOVE: Yao Defens with a bunch of Chinese quack doctors. I can just imagine them poking and prodding her. Are they really trying to help her or are they just interested in posing with her, like she's the Stanley Cup or something?


1972年出生在安徽省六安市舒城县舒茶镇的姚德芬,出生时重2.8公斤,在家排行老四,三岁时的饭量就相当于三个同龄孩子。11岁身高1.9米,从此疯长不可收拾,到15岁竟有2.08米,今年已长到2.3米, 比篮球明星郑海霞还高22厘米,被称为“亚洲第一女巨人”。
这个因为比郑海霞还高出22厘米而备受瞩目的“女大个”,现在生活得怎么样呢?据中新网报导,姚德芬说,这两年辛苦工作却什么都没有得到。她说,2003年,她为了生计和赡养母亲,与宿州市一艺术团的老板丘某签订了演出合同,在全国范围内进行巡回演出,演出过程中,她先后几次摔倒在地, 身体多处受伤。可当她要求老板邱某带她去检查时,却依旧被逼着上台表演。

ABOVE RIGHT: Is this the evil "Mr. Qui"? Well, we don't have definite proof, but he's the only Mr Qui who shows up on the internet and he's from China too! On top of everything else, this guy is the "Vice" Minister of China's Ministry of Construction! The deeper we dig into this story the hotter it becomes. Right now it's like molten lava.