Thursday, January 15, 2009

BREAKING NEWS: STEELER REVELERS HAD BETTER BRACE THEMSELVES FOR BIG TROUBLE SUNDAY NIGHT!!!


PITTSBURGH, PA

© “Pittsburgh’s Black and Gold”

So are you going to Heinz Field for the big game Sunday night? If not, are you going to visit your favorite drinking establishment to enjoy the game on a big screen? Maybe you’re simply planning on going to a friend’s house?

Wherever you may be going on Sunday, be forewarned: “Pittsburgh’s Black and Gold” has learned through extremely reliable sources that there is a major effort underway by Pittsburgh as well as Pennsylvania State Police to aggressively enforce the state’s drunk driver laws.



Above: A sobriety checkpont. These should be in great evidence along every major roadway in the Pittsburgh area on Sunday evening.

The size and scope of this effort is going to be unparalleled in the history of this region. The master plan is that there will be a multitude of sobriety checkpoints being maintained by police and mobile jails to temporarily hold the offenders before shipping them off for processing.


Pittsburgh’s Black and Gold” has also learned, in another exclusive, that Port Authority buses will be parked at these checkpoints so that drunk drivers may be detained prior to their vehicles being towed!

Apparently with this game being so important and also being played so late in the day, officials are justifiably concerned that there could be thousands of completely intoxicated Steeler fans making the roadways a potential death trap.

We’re all in favor of tailgating and the entire “joie de vivre” that surrounds the whole Steeler experience, but you also need to remember that the penalties in this state for drunk driving and the potential harm that you can do to your life, your occupant’s lives or the lives of other innocent bystanders is simply not worth the risk.

Be smart, have a good time but stop drinking by halftime so that hopefully you’ll be within the legal limits by the game's end. If you don’t have the self control to do that, don’t put yourself behind a wheel or arrange for a designated driver. If you don't, the odds are very good that you'll spend this night sleeping it off in jail.


Above: This is what we used to call in Pittsburgh a "PAT bus". Come Sunday night you may find that with the addition of a few cops that you have an instant mobile jail!

Prediction: The big story, besides the Steelers victory is going to be the hundreds of people who are going to be arrested after this game along the roadways of Pittsburgh. We didn't publish this story to circumvent the police, but rather to hopefully prevent some fellow Steeler fans from making this serious mistake. Don’t say that you weren’t forewarned!


If this message even saves one person from drunk driving, it will have been way well worth it.