Wednesday, March 4, 2009

PENGUINS REJECT SATAN!!!


"P.B. & G." PHOTO PROVES TO BE "THE LAST STRAW"---Ray Shero

You know all this trouble that the Penguins have been having this season? They finally traced it to its' roots and found that no, it wasn't Michael Therrien's fault after all! The real problem, the Pens found, is also the same problem with about everything else on earth these days... Satan!!!

Above: Satan minus his earthly "cloaking device". With a true appearance like this, you'd think he would've gone harder to the net!

Above: Satan with his girlfriend. Notice the color of her dress! Interesting coincidence? Me thinks not!!! In another interesting coincidence, guess what colors the New Jersey Devils wear?

Proving once again that, "Idle hands are the Devil's workshop", Satan, above, was caught by an alert "P.B. & G." reader recently goofing off instead of practicing. New Coach Dan Bylsma won't stand for this nonsense from his players unlike previous softie Mikey Therrien! So because of the help they received from "P.B. & G.", Pens' G.M. Ray Shero decided to pull the plug on the Satan experiment and place him on waivers, calling this photo, "The last straw."

The Penguins, in rumors largely floated by their own myopic fans, are also said to be having trade deadline discussions with Ryan Malone and Jarko Ruutu. With Gary Roberts already on waivers and Mark Recchi said to be available, Ray Shero only needs to speak with the agent for Colby Armstrong to once again reunite the whole team and insure another glorious playoff run. All of these players will be obtained reportedly for Jordan Staal!

Stay tuned Penguins fans!

No comments: